Immaturity at best.
This is the hat that Chowder wears on the Cartoon Network show. It's an ok show but I really like his hat. It's warm. Make one. Be immature.
Notes: The yarn is doubled (two strands held together). Also, there are two sides and they are worked separately and sewn together.
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This is a pattern I made up so it's not perfect but it works. I doubled some purple yarn (like Red Heart or something, I know, that's like the worst quality). It worked well. You can use wool or something probably.
The gauge is 2 sts. or two rows = 1 inch.
This is for teenagers, adults or older kids, so if you're knitting for a baby or little kid then you might have to mess with it a little until you get it right.
CO 25 sts. Work the first two rows in a 1X1 ribbing.
Next, go into Stockinette stitch.
This next part is confusing but I hope it makes sense. You need to decrease.
Row 1: k1, k2tog, knit until last 3. k2tog, k1.
Row 2: Purl.
Row 3: Knit.
Row 4: Same as Row 1.
Do this sequence 5 times, until you have 17 sts. Then find the middle of that and k2tog (you'll need an even number). There should be 16 sts.
Knit until you have 7.5 inches of work. Then k8, put the remaining 8 on a stitch holder as the two sides are worked separately. These will be the horns.
You'll need to decrease.
Row 1 of the horn: Knit.
Row 2: k2tog on each end.
Repeat this until you only have 1 stitch left. BO. Do the same thing for the other horn. You have now finished the back of the hat.
Now you need to make another one of these lovely creations. Just follow the same instructions. You should have two identical pieces of fine knit ware.
With the RS facing in, sew along edges with a yarn needle. Turn the whole thing inside out and wear it. Hopefully you'll collect some odd looks.
You could make one with stripes or pompoms or something too.